It's A Dog's Life

It's a dog's life when you continue to exceed everyone’s expectations except your boss's.

A dog gets abused and a fail review, despite spectacular performance...

“How did it go?” asked Sam.

“Not very well,” sighed John, throwing his satchel on the dining table in disgust, and moving to the fridge to make himself a strong drink.

“Why?” Sam was surprised. John was good at almost everything he did and always gave his best to whatever he did.

To keep his depression at bay and get some exercise and income, he had recently applied for a door-to-door market research interviewer’s job at one of the companies he had worked for over a decade earlier.

He had been accepted, but the wages hadn’t moved much in over a decade. Most of Nielsen's old staff had moved on. Maybe GFC (Global Financial Crisis) had taken its toll on the company or maybe the market research industry in New Zealand just had a high turnover anyway.

John had been confident that his quality work would be recognized through swift pay reviews, and his immediate supervisor had seemed happy until today. He had been given more and more hours, and taking that as a good sign, he had requested a pay review now that he had been there three months.

It had been declined.

“A butcher was really surprised,” John was saying, “when a dog came into his shop. He shooed it away. But the Dog just wouldn’t leave. So, he went over to chase it out, and noticed a paper in its mouth.”

The dog put the note down on the ground, and pawed it repeatedly, looking at the butcher.

Curious, the butcher picked up the note. It read: Can I have a dozen sausages and a leg of lamb, please. The money is in the dog’s collar.

The butcher looked closely, and behold, a little plastic envelope was tucked inside the collar. He unbuttoned the envelope. Inside, was a twenty-dollar bill.

So, he took the money, put the sausages and lamb in a carry bag, and placed the bag’s handle around the dog’s neck. Returning the change back to the envelope, he buttoned it back to the dog’s collar.

The patiently waiting dog turned and left the shop. The butcher was very impressed, and very curious now to see what the dog did next.

Since it was about closing time, he quickly shut up shop and followed the dog. The dog walked down the street until it came to a level crossing. There it stood up on its back paws and pressed the button.

Then it waited patiently, bag in neck, for the lights to turn. When they did, he sauntered across the road, with the butcher in tow.

It came to a bus stop, where it stopped to look at the timetable. The butcher was in awe by now.

The dog checked out the bus timings, and then went and sat on an empty seat in the bus shelter.

Along came a bus. The dog walked around to the front, peered at the number, and went back to its seat. Wrong bus!

Another bus arrived. Again the dog went and looked at the number. It was the right bus. It climbed on. The astonished butcher followed it onto the bus.

The bus traveled through the town. The dog looked serenely at the scenery flashing by, its demeanor unperturbed by the weight around its neck.

Eventually it got up, and moved to the front of the bus. When it was time, it stood on its hind paws and pushed the button to stop the bus. Then it got off, the groceries still secure around its neck.

Dog and butcher walked along the road again, then turned into an alley. The dog walked up the path to a derelict house, and knocked politely. Nothing moved.

The dog woofed once. Nothing. It growled louder. Nothing. It let out a loud bark. Nothing still.

It lowered the grocery bag onto the steps, and with one paw on the bag to hold it still, wriggled its neck out of the carry bag handle. Then it trotted back down the path, turned and came racing back to the door. It hurled itself at the door. Nothing happened in response.

It did it again. Still nothing seemed to moved inside the house.

The dog went back down the path, hopped up on a narrow wall, walked over adjoining ramparts, and jumped over gaps until it finally reached a ledge outside a high window on the house wall.

It beat its head against the window several times. Then suddenly, it jumped off, walked back up the steps and waited patiently at the door.

The butcher watched as a big guy opened the door, and started abusing the dog, kicking him, punching him, and swearing at him. The horrified butcher ran up to stop the big guy.

"What in God's name are you doing?” he cried out. “This dog is a genius. He should get a medal!"

"You call this clever?” the guy barked back. “This is the second time this week the stupid bugger’s forgotten his key."

“Moral of the story,” John concluded, as he walked out to farewell the sun setting behind his porch. “You can continue to exceed the onlookers' expectations, but still fall short of your boss's expectations! It's a dog's life after all.”